When we tell someone “I appreciate it,” whatever “it” is we are showing that we are grateful for what they have given us. A hand, a lift, a smile, some love, a gift, their time, some understanding. They gave “it” to us and by recognizing “it” with appreciation we actually give right back.
Most likely they would have done whatever they did, said whatever they said, provided whatever they provided for no recognition what so ever.
But why not show your gratitude? With one simple affirmation…. “I appreciate it.”
I admit I did not always appreciate what I was given. Maybe if I did, things would be different. Honestly, I barely allowed people to share their gifts with me. I wasn’t “needy.” I did “everything” and didn’t need help or recognition. I was the giver.
But now, now I see it differently. People want to share their gifts. Others want to give too. I want people to know that I see what they are doing, who they are, how they give, what they give and I really do APPRECIATE it.
I appreciate when you pick up my slack. (especially when you don’t judge my slack while picking it up)
I appreciate your initiative. (more than you can imagine)
I appreciate your text, your note, your email, your phone call. (they lift me up, make me smile, laugh out loud)
I appreciate when you say I heard you, I am thinking about you, how are you or want to come along?
I appreciate when you do the heavy lifting, when you say don’t worry, “I got this” or “what can I do”
I appreciate that you notice, that you listen, that you share.
I appreciate that you show up. (triple what you can imagine)
I appreciate the generous gift of your time. I know that you are busy. I know that you have your own “stuff” I know that in that moment, in that instance, in that gesture you gave me what you had and I am grateful.
You. Yes you. You know who you are. I appreciate you. I appreciate it.
I use the word LOVE a lot.
I read this book called “One Word.” The concept was to choose a word to live out for the year and you will transform all areas of your life. According to the book, there will still be struggles but mostly massive growth if your focus is laser like on your one chosen word. Any word, your choice. Balance, Peace, Trust, Focus, Inspire, Together….you get the picture.
I chose the word LOVE.
I’ve always felt like I had big love to give. Had a big enthusiastic heart. But I didn’t feel I was sharing it my best way. My children definitely were receiving it and my family & friends to a certain degree but not on the scale that I felt I was capable of. I began raising my love energy for everyone, everything, every situation including myself. Where thoughts of anything opposite love came to mind I try to replace them with a loving thought. Where there is fear, I try to be love. Hate/love, anger/love, pain/love, unkindness/love, complaints/love, dissatisfaction/love. Impatience/love. Just love. Not always easy. But I try. HARD. When I hear myself saying…. I “hate” this thing, task, situation, I immediately say I “love” it. The shifts are sometimes subtle but I’ve been noticing the difference.
I’ve found some people are afraid of that word. It carries too much weight for them. It’s too powerful. It delivers too much emotion. It can scare people away when you use it because of their preconceived notions about love and what it means. Once I missed the entire second half of a Redskin game in an intense debate over the proper use of the word and how it “should be used.” How it “should be reserved for the ONE” and used with great caution. This stranger seated next to me thought that only one person in your life was worthy of the word so you shouldn’t use it “lightly”. I thought very much the opposite.
Truth be told…… I LOVE. I am not afraid to say it.
I believe that you should not reserve your great love for just one person. Don’t get me wrong, I believe in romantic love, being in love with someone. In a special love relationship with someone. That’s important love too. But I believe that you should be a lover of all. I believe that when you love all people and I mean ALL people you can change your world, change THE world. Living with an open loving heart is life altering. Not always easy, sometimes hurts, but so much more fulfilling, honest and real.
It’s transformational. It erases fear. Its settles anxiety. It lowers defense. It builds connection and community. It heals. It helps. It supports. It creates miracles. really.
Especially when you also love yourself.
And being a lover to your core, makes you better equipped to be a true and honest lover in your special romantic love relationship.
It’s truly amazing the power of love. A great and positive force.
I have enthusiasm, warm attachment, for people, experiences, events, big things, little things. I have strong affection for humans, all of them. Even the difficult ones. Deep down EVERYONE, at their core, even the worst people, just want to be loved. Might as well give people what they really need. right?
So when I say I love someone, something, you, it, that, this. I mean it. You have my heart, my strong affection, my benevolent concern, my tenderness, my BIG enthusiasm.
You are welcome to it. I want to share it.
Loving it all for you makes me feel good. Especially when you are loving it too!
Total Love Junkie. that’s me.
(original post from June 30, 2013)
Let’s try this. Let’s try LOVE as our weapon.
Let’s try battling fear, pain, anger, resentment, judgment, attitude, irritation and any other anti love energy you can think of. All the bad energy we encounter in any moment, daily, weekly. Let’s just try this. All of us.
Let’s try compassion instead. Let’s play offense instead of DEFENSIVE.
Let’s play a Love game. The rules are simple.
Believe that everyone is not against you but FOR you. Believe that no one is better than any other because of any certain circumstance. Treat people as completely equal on the most basic level. One beating heart to another. Every person. Interact in a way that no one is superior nor inferior. Believe that everyone you come in contact on a basic level wants this: to be loved. to have peace. to be valued.
And interact from that place. In your home. On the highway. In line at Costco. At school. At Work. While you shop, volunteer, network, walk the dog, answer the phone, pick up your kids, pick up your dry cleaning, buy your slurpee, order your chipotle, while you deal with your daily. Bring your love energy. Your light.
I mean everywhere.
Let’s see what wins.
One by one, heart by heart, let’s start a peaceful revolution. Maybe we can rid the world of ugly, intense pain, of anger, resentment. The desire to hurt others. Maybe the people you touch with your love, your light, your heart will touch the one whose mind has gone dark. Maybe your change of heart will change another’s, who changes another’s, who changes the one who is planning something dark and evil for humanity. Or dark and evil for the community, or evil in their own family. Maybe?
It is not out of the realm of possibility.
Let’s use love as our weapon for mass destruction of hate. Let’s use is as a tool for mass construction of a peaceful world for our children. Start in your own house, then continue outward to everyone in your sphere, on your path, family and strangers alike. Hate is learned and modeled. Let’s teach peace, acceptance, tolerance, empathy. Let’s model goodness.
I am not talking about romantic love. I am talking about a general love energy for all. Where those you meet at every turn are greeted with your smile. Those who get your “knickers in a twist” are treated with calm and patience. The toughest birds are given your laughter, your ease. The ones with the sad eyes, the upside down smile, the ones in visible pain, are given your attention, your light. Be a helper. Help others feel loved. And when you are given the love…..be an OPEN receiver. Accept it and pay it forward. Don’t block it.
Let’s see what happens.
Not only does love breed love, it breeds peace, happiness, joy. If this was the overriding energy in everything and I mean everything we did, imagine the miraculous change.
Let’s do it for our children. Let’s do it for each other.
Family Recovery Advocate
I serve women seeking healing and transformation.
I serve people who have been impacted by addiction recover their lives.